Started something I can't finish.  Wish I could but I can't.  Family is falling apart and have to let it go.  In counseling and trying to save my marriage.  If you lose faith and things seem ok, get counseling anyway.  Truth is good but relationships matter just as much.  Maybe she leaves me an I come back and finish this.  Maybe I let go the hurt and salvage the family.  Maybe one day we are at a place where she lets me finish this anyways.  Maybe one day the old farts in slc come clean and blogs like this wont happen.  Good luck to all who are searching for answers.